Bollettieri's Shocking Announcement

As I write this, we are in the midst of a truly momentous sporting weekend. Apart from the British Grand Prix and the start of a little something called the FIFA World Cup Finals (!), the news has been dominated by the French Open, where the Men's Final will be contested, as expected, by Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal, and the Women's Final by Justine Henin-Hardenne and Svetlana Kuznetsova. The limelight, however, has been stolen by seventeen year old Nicole Vaidisova, a product of the Nick Bollettieri Academy, who knocked out reigning Wimbledon champion Venus Williams and current World Number One Amelie Mauresmo before succumbing to Kuznetsova in the semifinal.
This performance has astonished the sporting world. Most are shocked at the Czech teenager's maturity on court, whereas some who who have followed her career since 2004, such as this correspondent, are bewildered as to why it took her so long to display her potential at a Grand Slam.
The real shock, however, came from Nick Bollettieri's latest announcement. Buoyed by his students' remarkable success rates at ever younger ages, as demonstrated by Miss Vaidisova, he has now announced that the Academy will take things one step further by starting advanced training for toddlers. Bollettieri claims that this ambitious move could lead to eight year olds winning Grand Slam titles by 2015.
The announcement has evoked a mixed response. Groups that are for the rights of children have stated that they will oppose this move, as it amounts to exploitation of children. In contrast, the proposal has received the backing of the ATP, the WTA, and various marketing agencies. They believe this could attract more youth to the sport. The move has also received support from unexpected quarters. A reclusive Peter Pan-like popstar has praised the plan, saying he would like to see more young children in the game.
Elsewhere, FIFA has announced a parallel world championships for the numerous players who are missing the World Cup Finals through injury or are still recovering. The tournament has already got the votes of stars such as Wayne Rooney, Francesco Totti, and Andriy Shevchenko.


[Welcome to On The Ball, a series of weekly reports presenting aspects of the sporting world in a lighter vein. In my first post, I haven't taken many risks and mostly stated plain facts, but with slight twists (no such announcement from Nick, obviously. No parallel tournament either- that was just a dig at the number of stars injured coming into these World Cup finals). As the series goes on, you shall see me getting a bit more adventurous and sometimes downright rude, especially when it comes to my favourite whipping boys Chelsea and Arsenal. Now that the intro to the series is done, that's it for my first day on the job! Come back again!]